"Some You Give Away" - BL one-shot

Summary: I wrote this BL one shot story last summer. It's from Lucas’ POV.
It’s not your ordinary drama-romance story, it’s a tragic one shot that introduces a new person in Luke’s life, while another life is taken away.

Warning: I cried my heart out writing it, and you might too reading it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

‘’Some You Give Away’’


My name is Lucas Scott and I am a father.

At 6:28 A.M this morning, the most beautiful baby girl and the greatest joy I have ever known entered the world.
She is my daughter, Samantha Emerson Scott. We will call her Sam, because Brooke has always adored that short and sweet nickname and it fits our little girl perfectly.
I look down at her. She sure looks like a Sam. She's perfect, with 10 little fingers and 10 little toes. She has a full head of dark brown hair, and a cute little dimple on her cheek, just like mommy. She opens her small eyes and mouth, yawning and then studies me carefully - just as hard as I have been studying her for the entire 18 minutes and 23 seconds of her life so far.
She wraps her finger around mine, holding on quite tightly. Man, this girl has got a grip. She is going to be a fighter, a warrior, a survivor. Just like mommy.

**

(flashback)

"Lucas I'm tired" Brooke complained, her face pale and sweating. We are in the delivery room, and our lives are about to drastically change.
"I know baby, I know. You're almost done though, you're almost there"
"Okay Mrs. Scott, we need one more push and your baby will be out" the doctor advised.
Brooke shook her head and sobbed. "I can't do it..I can't!"
"Yes you can! C'mon babe just one more” I hold my wife's hand tightly. I wanna make it all better and make the pain stop but obviously is not in my hands. All I can do is reassure and just be there for my wife.
Brooke screamed and pushed and finally we heard a powerful cry.
The doctor lifted the crying newborn up. "Congratulations, it’s a girl!" he announced.
"Oh my gosh"
I do the honors and cut the umbilical cord and the nurse takes our daughter away for a few seconds, to weigh her and make sure she is healthy.
I kiss my wife several times and tell her how great she did. She's quite pale now, and she looks extremely tired.
"Let me….see my baby" she rasps.
The nurse wraps our bundle of joy in a blanket and allows me take her to Brooke. My heart melts the moment I hold my daughter. I am already in love and completely crazy about her. I place her in Brooke's arms and we both look down at our child. Tears of joy drip down our cheeks and everything I will ever need, I have right here. Nothing in the universe matters to me, because I am the luckiest guy in the world....

*********

The day we found out Brooke was pregnant was one of the happiest days of my life. I was at work when I got a frantic call from Brooke. She wanted me to meet her in the park immediately by the garden. She had big news to share. My only instinct was that Brooke had gotten that 2nd clothing line she so badly longed for. But boy was I in for a surprise.

As I hurried out of work and drove to the park to meet my wife, I was able to spot her from quite a distance. She stood by the pond, feeding the ducks. I stopped and stood against the tree, because I wanted to watch her for a few moments. She was glowing, wearing that red dress that I absolutely loved on her. The sun beamed down her pretty face, then it disappeared behind some ominous looking clouds. As I approached Brooke, she looked up and smiled at me. We greeted each other, and then I kissed her lips and she buried herself in my arms. I stood there holding her, and she placed her hand on my chin and grinned.

[i](flashback)[/i]

"What's going on?" I inquired.
"I have something to tell you"
"What is it?"
"I'm pregnant. We're going to have a baby!" she cried.
My jaw dropped. I was in complete shock.
"What?!"
"You’re going be a daddy. I went to the doctor today and she confirmed it. I'm 6 weeks pregnant!"
"Oh my god!" I exclaimed. I picked Brooke up and twirled her around. She squealed in delight. The sky darkened, and suddenly it started raining hard. We kissed each other passionately and savored the moment. My dream was coming true; I was going to be a father!

**********


It seemed like life couldn’t be better. It was always a dream of Brooke and I, to have a family.
But one day, things took a wrong turn and the unexpected happened. 4 weeks into her pregnancy, Brooke started getting sick. At first we thought it was normal, that these types of things happened in pregnancy, but it got to a point where it wasn’t just normal. We went to three different doctors and learned that Brooke had developed a fast case of lung metastases, a type of cancer that spread from the tumor to the lungs. My world fell apart. Cancer. Pregnant. Pregnant patient with cancer. Never in my life had I imagined hearing those words together.

As we sat in the dark and small doctor’s office room, my heart was beating so fast, it hurt. I looked at my wife. She was sitting calmly and nodding, listening carefully to what the doctor suggested. How was she so cool about all this, so together and in one piece?

“So doc, how soon can we get rid of this cancer?” I asked.
He hesitated. “I’m afraid we’re past that state, Mr. Scott. It’s no longer in our hands”
No. No. No.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” I cried.
“Lucas” my wife began.
“ She’s pregnant, god damn it!” I yelled.
“I know, I know she is. This just makes everything more complicated. The baby is at risk too. You have two options here. One – you can take a huge risk and pray you can go full term.. or two, terminate this pregnancy and take care of your health.”
“No.” my wife said quickly. “Never. I waited so long to have a baby, and I am not going to give up.”
“Brooke”
“No Lucas. I know what you’re going to say. You’re going to tell me to abort our baby and take care of myself. I’m not going to do it!”
“Babe, you have to understand the conditions”
“What conditions?! You want this baby as much as I do, right?”
“Of course I do” I say, my eyes welling up with tears. How could I choose? How could I choose between the love of my life and our unborn child?
“Please think about it and let me know what you come to” Dr. Jacks says. “We don’t have much time”


The doctors left it in our hands to decide weather or not we wanted to take the risk and have Brooke deliver the baby. Both Brooke and baby's life were at stake but Brooke insisted she take the chance and have our child. She was well aware of the fact that there could be serious complications at any point throughout the remainder of the pregnancy, but she followed her heart and did what she felt she had to do. Brooke had made a decision, and nobody was going to stop her.

Not all cancer patients can go full term pregnancy. But my pretty girl, well you see - she's a trooper. She's the strongest woman I have ever known. That hadn’t changed since that day I met her.


One day my daughter will ask me where her mother is...and I will say "Baby girl, your mother had cancer. She died right after she bought you into the world". My daughter will be scared and confused. She'll be sad, perhaps a bit angry as well. Tears will fall from her eyes and she will cry herself to sleep that night, just as I will. And nothing, not even one word or action will bring her mommy back. Nothing will bring my pretty girl back.

Brooke is dead, she's gone, and we won't see her anymore, will we?' I ask myself. I quickly change that question to a declaration: Someday, somewhere, somehow the love of my life will come back to me. Back home, in my arms where she belongs. And when she does, I will kiss her and hug her, then tell her how much I've missed her. She won't say anything, but she will smile beautifully at me. No words will be needed, everything my deceased wife wants to say to me will be said through her eyes. That's how our relationship tends to work.

We will meet again, and we'll be a family as we've always wanted to be. The family that goes to the park on Sundays and as picnics and plays basketball and bakes cookies.


I try to wrap my head around the events & changes that have taken place in my life, in the time frame of just 12 hours. My love, my soul mate, my one, my all...my wife, Brooke Penelope Davis Scott has been taken away from me. She’s left me all alone to raise our beautiful little girl. How will I go on?

***

"We're losing her"
"There's no heartbeat"
"Holding compressions..."
"Call it"
"Time of death, 18:36"

At 6:36 A.M this morning, my wife passed away. Two doctors come break the news to me.

"Mr. Scott, you understand there were complications and some uncertainty throughout your wife’s pregnancy..."
"And that the cancer played a major role and jeopardized her health from the start”. the second doctor added.
"We tried our best and we did everything we could, but we weren't able to save your wife." the first doctor finished.
My heart starts pounding and my palms get sweaty. My body aches and I lean against the wall and slide down, breaking down in sobs.
"We're so sorry for your loss" the second doctor sympathized. They leave the waiting room and I am left alone, crying my heart out.

My name is Lucas Scott and I am a widower.


END